My First Nine Gram Mushroom Trip

NOTE: I've been meaning to post earlier, but my attention and priorities had to be focused for some other big projects I'm working on. My intention is to post at least 3x's a month (this month it's only once, but I'll let myself slide on this one). I'm back and ready to reengage and share my love for mushrooms. Here's my trip report for a recent journey I went on earlier this month. This won't be a very long report. I'll reflect on the highlights.

Trip Date: 7.13.20

Nine Dried Grams of Penis Envy (Self-Love and Transcendence)

I felt compelled to go deep. To many experienced psilocybin enthusiasts, nine grams is considered a hefty dose. The late Terrance McKenna pioneered the "heroic-dose" standard of "five dried grams in silent darkness." I've been quite comfortable at the 5+ gram dose range for a while, and I figured it was about time to take it to the next level. And although this experience was profoundly visual and enlightening on many levels, it was a very fun and smooth ride and far tamer in comparison to my recent high-dose PSILOHUASCA experiences (For example, a recent 4 gram mushroom + 4 gram syrian rue trip was magnitudes more intense than this trip with mushrooms alone). 

I put together a mindfully crafted playlist and sat on the back patio for the come-up. I didn't even feel the slightest tension or bit of nausea. It was a beautifully smooth come-up. All my senses began to heighten as I could feel my consciousness ascend and my state of wellbeing continue to rise to a level of pure heavenly bliss. 

The first novel visual phenomenon I notice is this magnificent array of energetic fractal bits of data cascading and swirling up and down my blanket. It's as if I'm seeing a portal of energy spewing out data and knowledge through fractal and geometric transmissions. This is deeply mesmerizing and filling me with so much awe and joy. I look around my surroundings and see energetic grids of light and geometry enveloping everything around me. I head inside and the visuals begin to get even more visceral. I notice that the symbols that are superimposed over this grid of energy feels very ancient-very Aztecan or Mayan (yet, it feels ancient and futuristic at the same time). I'm transfixed by the beauty of all this. I catch myself lost in my trance and decide to go for an adventure in the shower.

As I'm showering I'm beginning to realize my next massive download of insight. As I'm using the handle in the shower to change the temperature I'm going on a journey in my mind around the world through space and time. Somehow the shower handle is a conduit for me to traverse different parts of the world and explore meaning through different temperatures of water. I realize the epiphany and tell myself out loud, "Every temperature tells a tale." Wow. I feel myself traveling to tropical jungles with warm waterfalls, harsh cold environments, lakes and rivers, and temples and ashrams. I even felt the presence of other people/beings in those environments of different states of water. It's as if in the water there is a blueprint of encoded data that transcends time and space. What is this that I'm experiencing?

After my shower as I'm drying myself off I notice myself in the mirror. Instantly, I give the biggest child-like smile I've given in many years. "Wow," I tell myself. I'm transfixed in awe of myself. I'm loving myself more and more. I then begin to play around and express a wide array of novel expressions to the mirror. I feel like I'm unearthing certain parts of my personality that I've suppressed for far too long-like my natural comedic and adventurous spirit. At one moment I feel and look like my typical self, then I do a slight change and all of a sudden I'm a surfer, a rockstar, Indiana Jones, Jim Carey and then Robin Williams. It feels like I've reconnected with my natural free-spirited higher-self who flows with massive self-confidence, joy, and love for life. A mirror can be a tremendously powerful therapeutic, especially when paired with mushrooms.

When I leave the bathroom I notice the light from the TV glaring my Mama's bedroom. I see her asleep and snoring while the dog is gazing at the TV watching the news. I can't let this happen. The sight of this made me sad. I can't let them both fall asleep with the news blaring. So I decided to put on Our Planet on Netflix. I put on an episode of oceans and marine life. As soon as I put it on I could feel a tremendous shift in energy. Seeing the lush radiant blue colors of the natural world filled me with such serenity and joy. I could see the glowing crystalline energy teeming from out of the TV. I left the room silently with the biggest smile on my face. Mission accomplished.

I spent the rest of the night in pure bliss and curiosity of my senses and surroundings. Everything filled with the most sacred warm energy I've ever perceived. It's like seeing through the eyes of a six year old-everything filled with utter awe and joy. I decided to stay up the whole night and relish the rest of the experience. It gave me a blissful afterglow that instilled even more love and inner peace within the very core of my being.

End Notes: I honestly had one of the best nights I ever had by myself. The experience feels like I partook in a crash course of life and the Universe directly from a school in the astral-realm. I feel that high-dose mushrooms journeys have significantly increased my level of resiliency, gratitude, and love of life. It has given me an abundance of creativity and a radical shift in perspective of myself, humanity, life and God. 

Although it was massively therapeutic, I feel I could have gone deeper. I did not put much time and attention into closing my eyes, and meditating. I was too entranced by the open-eyed visuals. For future trips I'm planning to implement more meditation in order to reap the higher benefits of mushrooms.

Is there an actual limit to how much YOU can actually love yourself? Can you in fact continue to love yourself more and more as life goes on? My pre-conceived notion of the limits of life and love have been completely obliterated. I firmly believe that there is no limit to how much one can love life and oneself. It is possible to keep on expanding-just like the ever expanding YOUNIVERSE.

Never stop ASCENDING!

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